Stars
by Ensign A. Icestorm
Summary: Janeway visits the Mess Hall in the middle of the night to look at the stars and do some thinking. Author's note: This started out as a short story for English class but well… you know me! Thanks to my Englishteacher who’s exercise made me sit down and tr


**Disclaimer:** Yadda yadda blaha blaha…Paramount owns the characters hey, couldn't we fans do a coup and steal them?. I own the silly story and the horrible lines. I am NOT making any money from this, I'm only writing for my own pleasure and the character's g. Since paramount and TIIC never let the characters do this, I am! So: ASSIMILATE THIS PARABORG! And, hmm, yes… no infringement intended.  
**Sumamry:** Janeway visits the Mess Hall in the middle of the night to look at the stars and do some thinking. Author's note: This started out as a short story for English class but well… you know me! Thanks to my English-teacher who's exercise made me sit down and try to write something.  
**Spoiler:** Hmmm… Well if Seven's a spoiler then: Some post-fourth seasonal once.

**Stars **

"Computer, lights. 25," a harsh voice said. As the computer obeyed, the dark room suddenly bathed in a dim light. The woman stepped longer inside. She was rather short; actually, she was much shorter than her commanding voice made you think. Her face, blue eyes and small lips, was surrounded by shoulder-short, red hair, normally in perfect order, now a little bit untidy and ruffled. She wore a black jacket, but the part above her chest and the shoulders were red. Her pants were in matching black and so were her high-heeled shoes. Kathryn unzipped the jacket and threw it over one of the chairs. Her grey turtleneck felt tight against her neck and she drew a finger between the collar and neck to ease it. Her four pips stroked against each other as the fabric bended. The Captain's pips and the Captain's red shoulders. Captain Kathryn. Captain Kathryn Janeway.

She ordered the computer to turn the lights off and with a happy sigh placed herself on one of the couches facing the great view-screen. She tugged her boots off and massaged her aching feet, stretched them and finally let them rest with the rest of her body on the sofa. She gazed at the stars as they flew by. How many times hadn't she done exactly this? Looking at the stars, trying not to think about the crew, the ship, the best way to get home. Home. Kathryn sighed. Stranded here, 70.000 lightyears from Earth with two totally different crews who did everything they could to put the other one in the brig had really been a challenge worthy her. She had set her mind on making it, to make these crews become one, to make them cooperate and find the best way home. The first days she had been determined to make it on her own. She'd been playing the martyr, maybe in a way to make amends for, as she saw it, the fact that it was she who'd stranded them there. It was first now that Kathryn actually could see what a waste of time and energy it had been to blame herself for them ending up here. It wasn't her fault that the Caretaker had decided to pull Voyager from its mission in the Alpha Quadrant and place them in the Delta Quadrant. And even though it was her decision to destroy the Caretaker's array, it was something that had had to be done and she had just been the one who had to do it. Kathryn sighed. Her eyes were fixed on a little blue star; maybe it was a planet, she didn't know. But it was nice to look at and right now that was all the information she needed.

How many things wouldn't have been different if they hadn't been stranded here? She would have been Mrs Mark Johnson, living in a house probably in Indiana, playing with her dog Molly. Kathryn smiled at the idyllic 'what if'-world. It sounded more plausible that she would be hard-working, and so would he, Molly would probably be an old dog now, more likely lying in the cool shadow of a tree than playing with her mistress. Kathryn's mind wandered to the rest of her crew; Harry Kim, a young man, eager to show himself mature and grown-up; Tom Paris, he too young and full of post-teenager energy; the entire Maquis part of her crew: B'Elanna, Chakotay and all the others; Tuvok, her ever so loyal Vulcan- friend and, not to forget; Seven, a Borg-drone who now did everything she could to become more human. All those lives would have been so different. Harry would probably have been promoted long time ago, living a Starfleet life, maybe even gotten married. Didn't he have a girlfriend? Libby? The name sounded familiar… Kathryn sighed as she thought about the next on her list: Tom. Well Tom definitely wouldn't have ended up dating B'Elanna! A half-klingon woman with a temper like the one of a hundred annoyed bees. No, he would never have met her. Kathryn's smile faded when she thought of the 'alternative universe'- destiny of B'Elanna and the other Maquis in the crew. They would have been in prison now. And _that_ would have been because of a certain Captain Janeway. It would have been she who had captured them and brought them back to Starfleet. As members of the infamous Maquis- rebellion, Starfleet was eager to find them and bring them to justice.

Kathryn thought back on that first encounter with the crew of the Liberty, and of course, the first time she'd met Chakotay. Before the mission Kathryn had seen pictures of him in the Starfleet database. He had caught her attention, brown eyes, dark hair and a facial tattoo. Seeing him in person had quite knocked her off guard. She'd meet a tough, hard-hearted, calculating opponent. But there had also been something else. There was something about him that made her believe, right from the start, that they would be able to cooperate, and in those first confused days, his will to help her, to help themselves, had been what made her continue to struggle and to hope, and as time moved on she kept on relaying on him. Every time she wondered about a decision of some sort, or when she didn't know what to do, he was there, listening and comforting her. How many times hadn't he made her dinner so that she would take time to eat something? How many cups of coffee hadn't made for her? How many lovely memories hadn't he given her? Kathryn smiled. She was so glad she had him. But there had been disagreements, times when he didn't support her decision. Those were the worst times. To go on, to have the strength to do something without him fully agreeing with her, that was so difficult! It hurt so much. And yet she did it, of course! It wasn't for nothing that he used to call her the most stubborn woman in the universe. But when this happened and it turned out she'd been right, he never became sour or angry. Neither did she when he was right. They couldn't afford that, arguing and being angry at each other. That would destroy all that they'd worked for…

Suddenly, the door opened. Kathryn turned her head to see who was up in such a late hour.  
"Hello there," she said to the tall figure in the door opening. She would have recognised that man anywhere.  
"Hi, Kathryn." Chakotay slowly walked up to her and placed himself beside her. Dressed in light-beige pants and a white shirt made him look comfortably relaxed and off-duty, in contrast to her.  
"Heard the latest?"  
"No. What?"  
"Rumours say that Tom and B'Elanna are throwing a party…"She raised an eyebrow, trying to make him continue. "You know you look a lot like Tuvok when you do that, don't you?" He smiled at her and she returned it. What else could she do? Those dimples could make a Borg smile back. "Anyway, the theme on this party is, according to the rumours, country. And then I don't mean 'country' as in green fields and cows but as in the music-style."  
"Fill me in."  
"You know: Cowboy, bars and Dolly Parton."  
"Dolls?"  
"Not dolls. Dolly. Parton. Famous 20th- century country- singer with big bosom and blond wigs."  
"Sounds like the Paris I know." He smiled. She moved closer to him until her back rested against his chest, his arms around her. They sat there, silent for minutes, both looking at the stars.  
"So, by the way, what were you doing here in the middle of the night?" he asked. She could feel his breath in her hair. It sent a shiver down her spine.  
"Oh, I was just looking at the stars… doing some thinking." She looked up at him and continued. "About old times."  
"I see." A moment passed. She could see the stars reflected in the corner of his eyes.  
"And you?" she asked, slowly turning head towards the bright stars outside in a futile attempt to regain control of herself, "What are you doing here?" Still looking at the stars she could feel him placing his cheek against the side of her head, resting against her hair, his mouth besides her ear. Pale skin against light-brown skin. A moment that seemed like an eternity passed.  
"I…" he whispered, making her head spin and her mouth go dry, "I just came for the stars."


End file.
